Rob Zombie - Hellbilly Deluxe

B: I really should save it for this year's Beefoween, but i need it today. Ow! What was that for? 

S: It told you last year. 

B: oh, right, "i hereby outlaw...." i was hoping you weren't serious, but a boot to the head rings loud and clear. May i proceed? 

S: of course, i still have a one more boot, though. 

B: understood. 

I've got good news and bad news. The good news is tonight we're listening to Rob Zombie's first solo album after White Zombie broke up. Maybe we'll save La Sexorcisto: Devil Music, Vol. 1 for actual Halloween. The bad news is we have to navigate this ethical vegan, PETA award thing. We are Sex-bob-omb, and we're here to sing about demons and living dead girls and rescue farm animals in our spare time! 

I'm joking, i hate the industrial food complex too, possibly more than most Vegans, ethical or not. I disagree with PETA strictly in terms of their approach to living living people and their eagerness to treat them in a decidedly unethical manner. PETA very much condones espionage, violence, arson, lying, and blackmail. 

What we need to understand is that "ethical vegan" is not a denotative syntagm. It doesn't simply mean that someone chooses to eschew all animal and animal byproducts for ethical reasons. It could mean that, it probably did mean that at some point, but not now. I have many friends who are vegan, and conversely i don't demand you cook your pets if i come over for dinner. Not everything Ingrid Newkirk says is wrong, by the way, but her logic leads to some pretty terrible places, like publicly saying of course she'd vehemently oppose a cure for AIDS if it involved animal testing. She has been directly likened to Che Guevara (born 45 years after Marx became a dead dead girl) by multiple people who aren't me. No, this isn't me going off on one of my tangents, it's all highly relevant. You know how Glen Danzig didn't actually kill your baby or rape your mom? That's because he isn't actually a psychopath. To the best of my knowledge, Rob Zombie is not a psychopath either. Ingrid and Che Guevera, though? Not gonna sugar-coat it, bat-shit insane, murderous psychopaths. Ingrid does at least seem to understand that killing people is extremely counterproductive to her larger goal of mercy killing all animals. 

I know this is a difficult concept for most people, but i'd like to think that my sharing of things Marx actually wrote is a giant leap toward showing you that there is a huge difference between saying that violent uprising and social revolution is inevitable given the internal cognitive-dissonance of enforced Capitalism and saying "i volunteer, and i brought enough ammo for everyone! Be a good Comrade or i'll put a bullet in your head too." 

My point is that Ingrid would rather euthanize 1,000 objectively happy and healthy animals a day than let them be "tortured," which very much includes finding them new "forever homes." PETA euthanizes 99% of all animals brought to their shelters in 30 minutes or less. 

I personally subscribe to only killing animals if you A) intend to eat them, B) they are dying a painful death in front of you, or C) they are legitimately devastating your resources. Hunting for sport very much offends me, but i'm not gonna burn your house down or refuse to eat your sandwiches over it. I also adamently defend assisted suicide and i do not want to be artificially kept alive, so maybe i'm the crazy one. 

Next on the list, not all animal research is equal. Every legitimate research facility has an animal care and use committee, and they are regularly audited and inspected. No, i'm not an immortality kind of guy, and no i'm not a humans are special kind of guy either, but knowledge doesn't grow on trees. Sadly, less and less food seems to grow on trees these days as well. 

Enough of my sillyness, on to my other sillyness. I adore industrial metal, and Rob Zombie cornered the market on mixing it with horror. Hellbilly Deluxe: 13 Tales of Cadaverous Cavorting Inside the Spookshow International, now that my friends is a title that just might make Dwight Yokum vomit. B-movie samples, necrophilia, the car from The Munsters, all things you definitely need to censor and hide from impressionable teenage minds, lest they grow up to be unpatriotic, depraved losers like me and Rob. He's objectively less of a loser than me, but i think i made my point, THIS ISN'T REAL!