Skid Row

So what's the deal with Skid Row? They were a functional band for two albums over 3 years, but it took another 3 or 4 years to finally fall apart. Unlike Christgau, i think Slave To The Grind is waaaaaay better than their debut. But is their debut bad? Again, Christgau thinks they are both bad, but given his preference for catchy tunes with a minimum of sexism and cliche, Skid Row is obviously the better album. So let's tear it all apart. 

I don't think we really need a historical rundown of the band, but it does help to understand that we're in New Jersey, and Bon Jovi literally owns them. Rachel and Snake signed away their royalties in exchange for Bon Jovi's publishing support. Standard pyramid deal, and eventually they got a little bit of their own money. It's much more complicated and intricate than that, but like i said we're in 1988 New Jersey, and we're talking about rebellious teenagers whose only available hobbies include bar fights snd sex.

Are some of the songs borderline sexist? For a given value of degenerate teenagers in New Jersey, i suppose. They aren't singing about your neighbor's daughter in college who volunteers at the nursing home and takes care of birds that fall out of backyard nests. There's at least two actual prostitutes and one now divorced adultress. These are the girls who like breaking the balls of dangerous guys, who then turn around and confess how much it hurts to have your heart broken. Also note, the narrator isn't the one in prison for beating up "a queer." It's a macho act for a tough world sung while wearing dude heals and leather. The key point is that it is an act, a survival skill when your friends are bigger drunken lunatics than you, Ricky being the wildest one, of course.

But damnit, the songs are phenomenal. Forget the lyrics, focus on structure. Story telling verses, huge sing along choruses, proper setups for the wailing guitar solos. Bolan has every right to brag about his songwriting prowess, these things are killer. The riffs are catchy and grooving, the transitions are so tight and effective, they don't recycle gimmicks or riffs, and it all paints a picture of teenage love on the sleezy side of the tracks. Booze and broads and bravado. Toms River, NJ isn't exactly downtown Brooklyn where our friends in Biohazard aren't having nearly as much fun, if you know what i'm sayin'. It's glam metal. 

People didn't like the more aggressive second album, but I'm not people. Are Skid Row the best? No. Is it good? Yeah, it's not silly party time music, it's much more realistic in terms of actual feelings, and the characters are believable if not actually likable. More importantly, they aren't calling themselves the good guys here. They have nasty habits, they are wild, and forget the corporate ladder, they can't even reach the bottom rung of the fire escape standing on top of the dumpster in the alley. Park Avenue really does lead to Skid Row, and it's only a block or two away from your office.