Albums for Eternity with Bottle, the Curmudgeon

Sum 41 rap old-school posse style on their hit single Fat Lip. Does that make them Nu-metal? All Killer No Filler certainly has Metal bookends. It's also truth in advertising, this is a phenomenal Pop-Punk masterpiece about being a restless teenager who hates all the modern first-world problems he has to deal with on a daily basis. There's a whole lot more emotional nuance than Blink And You'll Miss It, that's for sure. They're also from Canada, and I apparently haven't met a band from Canada I don't in some way like more than their direct US competitors. No idea why.  In case you're wondering, yes, Nu-metal is very much among the 40 something genre tags listed on their wikipedia page. Ridiculous, even they say they are just a rock band because Punk has too many rules to follow. They might be the youngest rock band I've ever mention in relation to the 2008 Universal Fire. I'm totally biased, this is one of my top ten albums for pure enjoyment to

... and we're walking, we're walking, watch your step as we enter this inauspicious folder called "music." Don't worry, we aren't making a stop in all 73 subfolders, just most of them (some of them aren't full albums and some of them aren't worth hearing or writing about at all).  If you look to your right you'll see the second band John Moyer played bass in, The Union Underground. This is a strange band, they only made this one album before John got called up to the majors, and it is somehow mistakenly called Nu-metal. It's much more Industrial motivated if you ask me, but that's not the strange part at all. You might remember their one hit Turn Me On Mr. Deadman, but a lot of these songs got serious radio play in the early 2000s, all the ones without swear words in them, at least. Lyrically, this album is bizarre because most of it is either specifically about drugs, Paul McCartney and John Lennon, or else uses lyrics from other famous so

I was gonna just do my ambling along to EL&P's version of Pictures at an Exhibition, but Spencer Elden has gone where I didn't think he wanted to go. This is a very sensitive subject, and I'm known for being mildly insensitive to make a point. Not so this time. You can go read my analysis of the cover on my blog, and in my second book, they were 100% accurate interpretations at the time. We, however, now stand on the precipice of a bifurcating reality. The opinions will be many and range from coherent to ridiculously stupid.  Here is the link to my analysis of the cover. https://albumsforeternity.blogspot.com/2021/01/chapter-1.html I deleted the cover because fair's fair. Now, here is my opinion. Does Spencer deserve a shitload of money from that image? Yes, absolutely, an insane percentage of gross sales from Nevermind. Will that fix anything? Probably not. Is this child pornography as the lawsuit claims? No. It's not.   The lawsuit as defined will do more dama

https://song.space/6j29nc/song/1757779 Walk with me. No, no, we aren't going anywhere in particular, just passing time. You know, i talk a big game, but i try to make it meaningful. You might not agree with me, you might be surprised that you actually do, that's not really my concern. We all have to contemplate our own mortality from time to time, but we should also take some time to chase away those blues.  We've all had a rough year or so, and it's tempting to try to will the world back to some simpler state of mind, but metaphorically speaking i dug my own grave long before they built fences like America is a gated community and people found any excuse to be as racist and mean as possible. Relax, it's just a metaphor. Not the racism part, that's terribly real and really terrible. I guess what i'm getting at is yes, obviously, you have to take care of yourself so that you can be in a position to help others, but you have to actually go do the helping other

... speaking of watching the pretty colors, it was insanely difficult to refrain from pre-ordering a copy of the sequel now that Between the Buried and Me have announced a second pressing. I do, however, have other expenses looming in the future, and getting the trucky truck running for the garden gnomes again set me back a little more than i would have liked. So, we'll just pull out the original masterpiece and be content to enjoy it in all its wacky progressive death metal goodness. I've got that 3rd book to work on and GREGORY'S piano album to bottle up in the meantime, Compy's still doing an excellent job of avoiding the tedious hyperlinking of the blog, Skip and Sandra are off on their own adventure without my having to participate. Time for my favorite past time, enjoying my own aimless wandering of the hallways while we all just keep waiting and floating toward the sun. Fun fact, it ends with a Picardy 3rd. Cheers.

S: i'm sure i'll regret it, but what were your other favorite tv shows growing up?  B: hmmm, i mean i liked all sorts of tv shows as a kid. I watched everything, age appropriate or not. From Sesame Street to Quincy.  S: sure, but what would you say right now were you all time favorite?  B: all time? Not contextual? Just favorite favorite?  S: yes.  B: in that case, i guess, Fraggle Rock, Danger Mouse, You Can't Do That On Television (that's the one where Alanis Morissette said she was going to be a famous musician some day), and The Adventure of Pete and Pete. Tons of runners up, though. 3-2-1 Contact (that's where Bloodhoung Gang got their name), Designing Women, The Golden Girls, Animaniacs, Wings, i even liked Full House and Family Matters, Fresh Prince of Bel-air, Welcome Back Kotter, Alf. I guess the top 4 are the top 4, though.  S: interesting.  B: As interesting as this thing Skip found with a giant crab on it?  S: too early to tell. I have a sneaking suspici

Literally the only thing i know about Marshall Crenshaw is that he's from Detroit. I replaced the alternator and battery in my Chevy Silverado today, so that's a better reason for picking this album than most.  I don't know about you, but the cover is giving me definite Elvis Costello combined with Huey Lewis vibes. I was 2 when he recorded it, it's 3 months older than my younger sister and 3 years older than Back to the Future, that's a fun coincidence. Is that an actual electric ukulele on the back? I'm expecting the kind of 80s Pop-Rock where if there were music videos for all the songs, those videos would be him exactly as depicted here singing them at the waitress as she refills his coffee. Press play... ... yeah, it's Pop Rock, but highly enjoyable. There She Goes Again is totally And The News, Someday Someway is straight out of the 50s, it's all great. Less Elvis Costello, more Buddy Holly. I can't believe for a second this is a random fluke r

Looters, Flashpoint, not sure which one is Hapshash or which one's flying West, but this is a vibe album. No doubt about it, the voice of Coincidence is practically screaming this is the opposite of Supertramp and Starcastle in pretty much every possible way. Compy's been teaching me some deep web spelunking techniques, so now i know that they have basically the exact same origin story as Metallica. Someone from New York heard their demo EP and went well out of his way to sign a band from the other side of the country immediately, and that's why Flashpoint by Looters exists.  Ok, so you don't name your band Looters and your debut album Flashpoint unless you're making a serious socio-political statement. NWA, UB40, Gov't Mule, they all tell you who they are by adopting what normally represents some derogatory stereotype as an ironically defiant form of solidarity. If we're at the bottom of the ladder, here's what we see looking up. I expect this will be q

Yippee! Starcastle, he says while lightly clapping and grinning like a lunatic. Was it really all the way back in February that we first encountered their 3rd album, Citadel? Time certainly flies. That was one of those highly contextualized reviews where i was pointing out that if you're even slightly out of phase with the acute vacuum of the band itself then it will not speak to you at all.  There is no mistaking Starcastle, you get exactly what they tell you you're going to get: castles floating through the sky on clouds. There's no snark, no irony, no hidden message, no intellectual challenge. This is bright, shiny, relentlessly happy, rainbow suspenders, Fantasy Prog from 1976, and if that's not your thing then you won't like it at all. We have to compare them to Yes, because Starcastle is literally like expanding Yes's Your Move into its own spin-off franchise. Regardless, wowzers, these guys are fantastic. Ripping guitar solos, energetic bass lines, more s

Ah, Supertramp. I love them, and now i have their first album. I mentioned they had an actual Dutch patron in their early years, and i've just spent a fascinating hour reading the actual verdict of an appeal to the House of Lords regarding the decision to levy taxes on his English Securities during his school years in the 50s. If you like semantic arguments about the term "ordinarily" then you'll be enthralled.  It sounds a lot more complicated than it really is. This was about capital gains taxes, and the court found that the commissioners had ruled correctly in this particular case. You might get all "taxation is theft" on me, but what are they actually taxing? They taxed the tangible profits from the sale of specific securities issued at the end of WWII.  None of that really matters, we're here to listen to Supertramp's first Prog album. Critics have that standard "instrumental music is self-indulgent" reaction, but you know my own tende

Prelude B: alright, Skipatron, what do we do? E: about what? B: well, i mean we both have reached our limit in terms of resources. I'm a bit tapped out on the record collection side of things, and i suspect you aren't totally thrilled to transition to the position of Transcriptionist of Doom. E: yeah, i was fine with the copy/paste/format game, but this retyping business is for the birds now that both you and Bridbrad are flinging words like flapjacks. Plus i liked album reviews better than politico-economics. B: me too. I can add new laptop to the budget queue, but it'll be a while. Any objections to letting GREGORY use all the brain power for a while? Who knows, the aroma might even coax p(nmi)t out of hiding. E: no objections, i suppose. Are you still going to keep writing about whatever? B: oh, yeah, absolutely. I couldn't shut up now if i tried. We'll just plan to hit it hard when the process is a little more convenient for both of us. E: deal. I think i might

You know what? We've covered over 700 albums from my personal collection in the past couple years. I still have hundreds more, but it's all random stuff that i don't really have an angle to talk about. Let's make that the angle.  Hey, Bottle, you got any randomly obscure 90s Alternative Rock that leads off with Bagpipes?  Funny you should ask, as a matter of fact i do. Here's Wonderworld from Molly's Yes. They came from the Tulsa scene and this album is from the same year All American Rejects formed a few miles away in Stillwater, 1999. Tulsa, Tulsa, other bands from around Tulsa you might know. Hanson. Some of my actual friends disagree with me when i say Hanson is a national treasure, but you know who does? Todd in the Shadows. Yeah, Bottle the Curmudgeon says if you can't bring it like Hanson, then maybe Pop Rock isn't your game. Tons of famous bands and musicians in all genres from all around Oklahoma, but that's about it as far as any kind of Ro

Awww yeah, it's time for the last album of the weekend. But before we start, i think i should remind everyone of how these stories subconsciously build themselves. I was flailing around for things to listen to, but getting nowhere. I couldn't take it any more so i went record shopping and picked 5 completely random records based on guessing what they would be without looking them up. We started this run by mentioning that my wife was watching the entire run of Psych, and now i guess we're going to do a surprise tornado headed right for us. Pardon my nonchalance, it's a bizarre side effect of the borderline personality that just like ADHD means i'm a freakin' cucumber in an actual crisis, now the exciting conclusion to our tale.  B: last record, who's got a guess on Lightning? Impressive deadpans, everybody. Nothing? Compy?  C: um, no, actually. I mean, yes they existed, i know where they are from, and who's in the band, but i'm 3 pages of search resu

B: here we are at the proper rum and coking hour. I've fully shaved for the second time in as many decades, refreshments are fuzzily fizzing, flip a coin what shall we talk about? Heads we Gentle Giant, tails we Lightning. We're gonna do both, we just have to decide which one first. Compy, would you like to do the honors?  C: well, seeing as you're 3 for 3 while Skip and Sandra have a combined total of zero, why don't we just lob the whiffle ball first so they don't feel so completely lost when it comes to judging by covers?  B: ok, here's Three Friends by Gentle Giant. Everybody altogether, 3, 2, 1...  EBS&C: English Prog!  B: feel better?  S: ok, yes. At first i thought you were being patronizing, but i take it back. Those first 3 were just really hard. This one is obvious.  E: but why though? It's almost like the first 3 were bad on purpose.  B: that's because they were. Detective was trying really hard to pick up extra sales by looking flashy. Wh

B: Sandra's turn, 3 to pick from, who next?  S: alright, you're doing such a good job of leading the witness, i'll play along and choose FM.  B: you're too kind, feast your eyes upon Black Noise.  S: Ew, what is that? Is that an arm coming out of his stomach? Is that supposed to be water or ice? Oh gawd, what's going on in the lower left hand corner? It's giving me the trypophobes.  E: it looks like one of those weird Vaporwave videos, but clearly this is from like the dawn of computer graphics.  B: no argument from me. Alls i can do is sweeten the deal. The back proudly proclaims this a Canadian Broadcasting Corporation production, and there's an electric violin/glockenspiel player named Nash the Slash. With titles like Phasors on Stun, Dialing for Dharma, and Slaughter in Robot Village, I'm going all in and calling this spacy proggy weird electronic studio experimentation, somewhere in here there's an alternate dimension contender for the Dr. Who t

E: ok, we did Sheriff, i guess we have to do Detective next.  B: sure, call my bluff. Read 'em and weep.  S: are you serious? That can't be coincidence.  E: that is pretty obviously the same photo, isn't it? Which one came first?  B: dunno, but we can compare the two pretty easily. This is the serious band portrait of Detective, taken with an expensive camera. These guys wanted to jump off the shelf into your cart whether you were record shopping or not. We also can't ignore that it's a Swan Song album, so it's definitely pre-1983, and Led Zeppelin's manager liked them. Sheriff was '82, so they were clearly trying to reference this album, certainly not the other way around. I bet Compy has all sorts of interesting things to say, but we're going blind on all of them, pre-conceiving our own notions. What do you think it'll sound like?  S: they look like The Cars. Is this some weird New Wave thing? It doesn't look like Prog either.  B: funny you

B: i got a good feeling about this batch, C-stine Chapel.  C: may i? hmmm. If i didn't know any better, i'd say you were going for the best and worst covers you could find.  B: you are good, but are any of these albums? I honestly don't know, never heard of any of them.  C: well, i mean it's all rock and roll to you and me, but you've got 2 Canadian bands, a band from Minnesota which is basically still Canada, one from England, and one half English/American hybrid. It's all so obscure even i don't know what they actually are.  B: i know, it's exciting. I agree, these are completely obscure from a mainstream perspective. I might recognize one or two songs once i hear them, but i don't know the limeys from the loons from the hats made out of racoons. I could probably educated guess about them, though. Wanna charge in all willy-nilly like normal?  C: actually, since you're compiling them yourself instead of sending me out, why don't we have a go

It's Surf the Stacks Saturday. C'mon knees, don't fail me now. We gotta see how many insanely obscure albums i can find this month. Here we go

  https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLVMgMdYqIEkbiG4IX-bbhz8-ANoKN5qK0 So i said to myself "Bottle, you have to do it eventually and you've got a little bit of an extended lunch break, why not take another stab at Chinese Democracy?" Then my lunch break was over, but i was only 3/4 of the way through it wondering how it morphed from the pretty strong start to an Industrial Metal album by Buckethead and a 9-piece choir of Axl's into a Vanessa Carlton album about the half read books on his high-school English class reading list and i had to tell myself "that's why." So, nope, still no idea what this thing is supposed to be, or is, or isn't, or what it's about, or how i'm supposed to bottle it up, or anything really. It's a nebulous cloud of impenetrability and this can't possibly be my official review. Feel free to give it a go yourself, i've still got nothing.

https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLmGzeZQVw_J6svpjqY-DteMjwtlCC8c1u Psst. It's me, Bottle, wearing my private investigator Fedora (Mrs. Bottle's been on a Psych binge, just play along). I got a tip from an anonymous source that  back in the 70s and 80s there was some gnarly stuff happening on the Detroit Jazz scene. As with all these things, Europe was much more interested than the US, so i had Compy work me up a fake passport, nenn mich Flasche. Mein Deutsch ist schlechter als mein Französisch, also verzeiht mein Englisch. Tonight we're checking out Griot Galaxy, the Avant-Jazz group led by Faruq Z. Bey. I couldn't spring the $40+ for TV on the Radio, so this kind of hard-core 3-digit collector's stuff is obviously out of the question. Youtube it is. The first video i saw was a live performance of Androgeny, and it wasn't long before i stumbled upon the best album title ever, Opus Krampus. So, let's delve into the awesome strangeness with their first and l

Electric Arguments. It's the third  The Fireman album, but the first publicly acknowledged by Paul McCartney. The Fireman is Macca and Youth experimenting together. Youth is the stripper name of Martin Glover, the founding bass player from Killing Joke. Wait, say that again? Paul McCartney and the bassist from Killing Joke were just having fun experimenting with writing songs together? Are you sure? Yep, and they included a 1/4 inch thick book of photographs of them painting on the walls with it. Now, depending on who you like to copy your opinions from, this is either fantastic stuff that fuels the flames of Macca's awesome string of albums from the decade of the naughts, or pretentious crap. You guys all know i have remarkably few thumbs pointed upward when it comes to Paul McCartney solo albums, except for McCartney and Ram, those i love. Collabs are totally different because that's where Macca's actual talent lies. It doesn't matter whether it's his song tha